Speak Up
In Christianity shame can creep up quickly and quietly. As a follower of Christ you are held to higher standards. There are many good and just commands from God that we are to follow to Glorify him and overall just make us better people. But because we are fallen and broken, we often do not meet the standards we are to follow. Unfortunately, our image and pride is so much more important to us, we often hide what we are going through to avoid judgement. We tell ourselves that if we just work harder we can get through it on our own and it will be fixed. That’s not how it works.
I told myself I would never be like that. When I was in high school many of the problems I went through were inflicted onto me instead of being my own personal struggles (yes there’s room to argue about that because I was still a sinner in high school). So I had a hard time understanding why people always kept their struggles a secret or were not ready to share them quickly like I was. Then I became a (somewhat kind of) grown up and started dealing with grown up things. My struggles from high school no longer affected me and now I began to really struggle with my own problems.
I went to church to retain the image because I was helping with the youth group but I would have anxiety from the time I went in until the time I basically sprinted out the doors at the end. I didn’t want anyone to talk to me or ask me questions about my life because I knew if I answered they would know I was lying. In my head I just thought, if I worked harder I can get through this and eventually this stage in my life will pass, so I just need to hold on a little longer. Well, I worked harder and waited for it to pass. It didn’t pass and I got tired and fell into my struggles again quickly.
I finally got convicted enough to talk to someone about it. Instead of being met with judgement and disappointment, I was met with love and care. See, my pride had kept me from experiencing real, raw fellowship with other believers. They were not asking me to be perfect, but they were asking me to run from sin and run to God. I couldn’t work harder because I was fighting a losing battle if I didn’t include God and his design for community among his people. People need to start speaking up about what is going on in their lives.
In Paul Tripps book, “Sex and Money” he shares two stories of people dealing with their sin issues secretly, worked harder and it helped for a little bit. But they didn’t keep God or accountability in the picture, causing them to fall back into their sins. I wonder if their stories would have been different if they had just reached out to someone who cares and walked through it with them. You. need. to. speak. up. If anyone can give me a reason as to why going through something by yourself is a better idea than going through it with others then I am willing to listen, but I can not think of even one. Speaking up will free you in ways that will take the weight off your shoulders. If you have no one to talk to, talk to me. No one should go through life alone. You have a God who is so in love with you that he gave up his own son to save you from the world and he wants to walk through this life with you, holding you. Speak up and cling to God, he is our only hope to get through this messy life of ours.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/03/smarter-living/talking-out-problems.html
Here is an article about why speaking up is so necessary and good for you.
Here is the citation for Paul Tripp’s book if you wanted to look at it!
Tripp, Paul David. Sex & Money: Pleasures That Leave You Empty and Grace That Satisfies. Crossway, 2013.
